Finding an Anxiety Therapist: A Holistic Approach to Lasting Change

If you're dealing with anxiety that shows up as constant worry, panic attacks, or that exhausting feeling of never quite being able to settle, you already know how much it can take over your daily life. Whether you're navigating high-pressure work environments, managing the demands of relationships and family, or dealing with the unique stressors of life in Jakarta, anxiety has a way of making everything feel harder than it needs to be.

Finding the right anxiety therapist isn't just about checking boxes or picking someone convenient. It's about finding someone who understands the complexity of what you're going through and can offer more than surface-level coping strategies. I believe in a different approach—one that honors how interconnected your mind, body, and life circumstances really are.

Understanding Anxiety Beyond the Symptoms

Anxiety isn't just a mental experience. It lives in your body—in the tightness in your chest, the sleepless nights, the constant tension in your shoulders. It shapes how you show up in relationships, at work, and in your own private moments. You might notice it as:

• Persistent worry that feels impossible to shut off, especially about work performance or relationship dynamics

• Physical symptoms like rapid heartbeat, shallow breathing, or chronic muscle tension

• Difficulty concentrating or making decisions, even on things that used to feel straightforward

• Irritability or emotional reactivity that surprises you

• Avoiding situations or conversations because they trigger overwhelming feelings

• Sleep disruption—either trouble falling asleep or waking up with your mind already racing

For many of the people I work with, anxiety doesn't exist in isolation. It often intertwines with relationship challenges, work stress and burnout, grief, or past experiences that your nervous system is still responding to. The body keeps score, and sometimes anxiety is the signal that something needs attention.

Why Generic Anxiety Treatment Often Falls Short

There's no shortage of advice about anxiety—apps, breathing exercises, positive affirmations. And while these can be helpful tools, they rarely address the deeper patterns that keep anxiety in place. I've seen too many people who've tried multiple approaches and still feel like they're just managing symptoms rather than creating real change.

Here's what I've learned through my own corporate experience and years of working with high-functioning individuals: anxiety often develops as a protective response. Your nervous system learned somewhere along the way that staying vigilant, anticipating problems, or pushing harder was necessary for survival or success. The issue isn't that you're broken or doing something wrong. The issue is that your system is still running old programming that no longer serves you.

This is why I approach therapy as an integrative and holistic process. I see anxiety through a biopsychosocial lens, which means I'm looking at three interconnected dimensions:

• Biology: How your nervous system responds to stress, how your body holds tension and memory, your sleep patterns, movement, and physical health

• Psychology: Your thought patterns, beliefs about yourself and the world, emotional responses, and the different parts of you that carry different fears and needs

• Social context: Your relationships, work environment, cultural background, daily rhythms, and the support systems (or lack thereof) in your life

When we address anxiety from all three angles, rather than just trying to change your thoughts or relax your body in isolation, the changes tend to be more sustainable and transformative.

How I Work With Anxiety: An Integrative Framework

My therapeutic approach draws from several evidence-based modalities, each offering something valuable for anxiety work. Rather than adhering rigidly to one method, I adapt based on what will serve you best.

Internal Family Systems (IFS)

One of the most powerful frameworks I use is Internal Family Systems. This approach recognizes that we all have different parts of ourselves—some that feel anxious and hypervigilant, some that push us to work harder, some that want to withdraw and protect us. Anxiety often comes from parts that are stuck in old roles, trying to keep you safe in ways that no longer fit your life.

Through IFS, we work to understand these parts with curiosity rather than judgment. What is your anxiety trying to protect you from? What does the part of you that can't stop worrying actually need? When we can listen to these parts and help them update their strategies, anxiety naturally begins to shift.

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)

ACT offers practical tools for changing your relationship with anxious thoughts. Instead of trying to eliminate anxiety (which often makes it stronger), we work on noticing thoughts without being controlled by them. This isn't about positive thinking—it's about psychological flexibility.

You'll learn to identify when you're caught in mental loops, to observe anxious thoughts as passing mental events rather than absolute truths, and to choose actions based on your values rather than your fears. This creates space for you to move forward in your life even when anxiety is present.

Relational Life Therapy (RLT)

For those dealing with anxiety in the context of relationships or preparing for marriage, Relational Life Therapy brings an important perspective. Anxiety often shows up in how we connect with others—through conflict avoidance, overcorrecting, control patterns, or emotional shutdown.

RLT helps you understand how your early experiences shape your current relational patterns and gives you practical tools to show up differently. This is especially relevant if you're noticing anxiety around intimacy, communication, or navigating relationship transitions.

The Nervous System and Embodied Practices

Beyond talk therapy, I incorporate an understanding of how trauma and stress live in the body. Your nervous system doesn't distinguish between real threats and perceived ones—it responds to work emails, difficult conversations, or upcoming presentations as if they're life-or-death situations.

Between sessions, I'll guide you through experiential meditation and mindfulness practices designed to help regulate your nervous system. These aren't generic relaxation exercises; they're targeted practices that help your body remember what safety feels like and build your capacity to tolerate uncomfortable emotions without becoming overwhelmed.

What Makes This Approach Different

Having worked in corporate environments and witnessed the intensity of startup life through my spouse's experience, I understand the specific pressures that many of my clients face. I speak the language of high-performance work cultures, the exhaustion of constant travel between Singapore, Dubai, and Jakarta, the complexity of maintaining relationships while managing demanding careers, and the unique challenges of cultural adjustment for those who've relocated.

My approach isn't about helping you become more productive or push through the anxiety. It's about addressing the root causes—the nervous system dysregulation, the relational patterns, the core beliefs, the lifestyle factors—that keep anxiety in place.

This means we look at everything: how you sleep, how you move your body, what you eat, how you set boundaries (or don't), how you manage transitions throughout your day, and the quality of your connections. Therapy isn't just about what happens in our sessions; it's about what rituals, relationships, and rhythms support your healing in daily life.

Who This Approach Serves Best

My work is designed for adults in their 20s, 30s, and 40s who are ready for transformative change, not just symptom management. You might be:

• Navigating work stress and burnout while trying to maintain your personal life

• Experiencing panic attacks that seem to come out of nowhere

• Dealing with relationship challenges or preparing for marriage

• Processing grief or significant life transitions

• Struggling with depression that coexists with anxiety

• Working through past experiences that still impact how you show up today

• Facing the unique stressors of cultural adjustment in a new country

I also work with couples who are ready to do deep work together. Anxiety often affects both partners, either directly or through the relational patterns it creates.

What connects everyone I work with is a readiness to go beyond surface-level solutions. You're looking for someone who can help you make sense of your inner world while also focusing on the practical changes that create lasting results. You want to understand not just what to do, but why certain patterns exist and how to fundamentally shift them.

Two Pathways for Individual Work

I offer individual counseling through two distinct structures, depending on your needs and timeline:

Weekly Sessions provide consistent, ongoing support for gradual, sustainable change over time. This format works well if you're looking for regular check-ins, accountability, and the space to process things as they come up in your life. Sessions build on each other, allowing us to go deep while maintaining the continuity that supports long-term transformation.

Intensive Sessions are designed for those wanting focused, accelerated progress through deep-dive work condensed into a structured timeframe. If you're dealing with a specific issue that needs concentrated attention, or if your schedule makes weekly appointments difficult, intensives offer an immersive alternative that can create significant shifts in a shorter period.

Working With Couples

All couples counseling begins with a customized Couple Counselling Intensive. This isn't standard couples therapy spread over months of weekly sessions. It's a concentrated process designed to help you reach your goals more effectively.

You'll choose between two intensive formats:

Exploration Intensive: A shorter process for couples who want to build clarity around a specific challenge—communication patterns, a particular conflict, or preparation for an upcoming life transition like marriage or parenthood.

Deepening Intensive: A sustained process for couples ready for deeper repair work and long-term transformation. This is for relationships where patterns have been entrenched for a while, where there's been a breach of trust that needs healing, or where you're committed to fundamentally shifting how you relate to each other.

Location and Accessibility

I work with clients in Jakarta through both in-person and online sessions, offering flexibility based on your preference and schedule. For those in Singapore, Dubai, or San Francisco, I provide online sessions that bring the same depth and quality as in-person work.

Online therapy has evolved significantly. Through secure video platforms, we create a private, focused space where you can do meaningful work from wherever feels most comfortable—whether that's your home, a private office, or even a quiet hotel room when you're traveling.

What to Expect When You Begin

Starting therapy can feel vulnerable, especially if you've been managing on your own for a while. I've designed my intake process to be clear and supportive from the first contact.

Free 15-Minute Consultation: We begin with a brief conversation where you can share what's bringing you to therapy and ask any initial questions. This helps us both assess whether we're a good fit before committing to the work.

Onboarding Process: Once you decide to move forward, my Client Care Coordinator, Mei, will guide you through the logistics—scheduling, paperwork, and any questions about the process. This ensures that when we have our first session, we can focus entirely on you rather than administrative details.

First Session: Our initial meeting is dedicated to goal setting and what I call "parts mapping"—understanding your history and the different aspects of yourself that show up in relation to anxiety. We'll also begin experiential work right away. I'll introduce you to meditation and mindfulness practices that you can use between sessions. This isn't about overwhelming you with homework; it's about giving you tools you can start working with immediately.

Ongoing Support Between Sessions

Once we've established a working relationship, you'll have access to me via WhatsApp for scheduling and scheduling-related questions. This isn't a substitute for therapy itself, but it creates continuity and removes barriers when you need to adjust appointments or have logistical questions.

You'll receive session reminders and continued guidance on the mindfulness practices we've introduced. For selected clients who've just completed particularly intense trauma-related work, I offer crisis support—though this is rare and only in specific circumstances. My intention is always to help you build your own capacity to navigate difficult moments while knowing you're not alone in the process.

Beyond Symptom Management: Creating Sustainable Change

What I'm offering isn't a quick fix. The kind of anxiety work that creates lasting transformation requires patience, curiosity, and a willingness to look at patterns you might have been living with for years. It means examining not just your thoughts, but how your entire system—body, mind, relationships, environment—supports or undermines your well-being.

This is about rewiring, re-patterning, and reimagining how you move through the world. It's about helping your nervous system remember that you're not in constant danger, teaching the anxious parts of you that they can rest, and building a life structured around what actually nourishes you rather than what you think you "should" be doing.

The research is clear: therapy that integrates multiple modalities and addresses the whole person tends to produce better outcomes than single-approach interventions.

But beyond the research, what I've witnessed repeatedly is that when people feel truly understood—when their biology, psychology, and life context are all honored—they stop just surviving their anxiety and start actually living differently.

Common Questions About Starting Therapy

How long does therapy take?This varies significantly based on your goals, the complexity of what you're addressing, and which format you choose. Some people work with me for a few focused months through intensive sessions, while others prefer ongoing weekly support over a longer period. We'll discuss your timeline and expectations during our initial conversations.

What if I've tried therapy before and it didn't help?Many people I work with have had previous therapy experiences that felt incomplete or unhelpful. Often this is because the approach didn't address the full picture—focusing only on thoughts without addressing the body, or providing general coping strategies without understanding your specific patterns. The integrative framework I use tends to reach places that talk therapy alone cannot.

Do you work with people who aren't in crisis but just want to function better?Absolutely. Many of my clients are high-functioning individuals who look fine on the outside but internally feel like they're barely keeping it together. You don't need to be in crisis to deserve support. In fact, addressing anxiety before it becomes completely overwhelming is often the most effective approach.

What about cultural considerations?Living and working across different cultures—whether you're an expat adjusting to Jakarta, someone maintaining connections across Singapore, Dubai, and other cities, or navigating the expectations of different cultural contexts—adds layers to anxiety that many therapists don't fully understand. My own experience and the clients I work with have taught me to consider these cultural dynamics as part of the larger picture, not as separate issues.

Taking the First Step

If you've read this far, something likely resonated. Maybe it's the recognition that anxiety isn't just in your head, or the understanding that you need more than techniques—you need someone who sees the whole picture. Perhaps it's simply the relief of reading an approach that makes sense of what you've been experiencing.

The decision to reach out for support is significant. It means acknowledging that how you've been managing isn't sustainable, and that you're ready for something different. It means being willing to look at patterns you might have been avoiding, to sit with discomfort in service of real change, and to invest in yourself in a way that many people never do.

I can't promise that therapy will be easy or comfortable. Working with anxiety—especially when we're addressing the deeper roots—requires courage. But I can promise that you won't be doing it alone, and that the process will be grounded in understanding how change actually happens, not in generic advice or one-size-fits-all strategies.

If you're in Jakarta and looking for in-person or online support, or if you're in Singapore, Dubai, or San Francisco and interested in online sessions, I invite you to start with that free 15-minute consultation. It's a low-pressure way to see if this approach feels right for you, to ask your questions, and to begin imagining what life might look like when anxiety no longer runs the show.

Your nervous system learned to be anxious in relationship—with caregivers, through experiences, in response to your environment. The good news is that it can also learn something different in relationship. Through the therapeutic work we do together and the practices you develop in your daily life, you can build a more connected, grounded, and authentic way of being in the world.

Reach out when you're ready. I'm here to walk this path with you.